Journeying to 101. A Personal Manifesto.

Personal Manifesto 2

Two weeks ago,  I had the opportunity to lead a discussion with some colleagues on the work of Simon SinekIn short, Simon Sinek argues that everyone has a why that motivates them daily. He defines our why as the purpose, cause, or belief that inspires us to do what we do. Our why reflects our core values and personal convictions. If you have a few minutes, check out his TED talk, I think it’s pretty good.

It turns out that identifying my why made it onto my 101 list! Seems like that’s all I write about on here these days (I have to save my other writing for that big project I’m working on). On the list this item looks like, “Identify my core/guiding values and display these in my home,” but that’s simply an extended phrase for identifying my why.

After thinking a bit about my values, I came up with the above manifesto. Because I’m driven to challenge myself, I tried to flex my teeny-tiny creativity muscles to come up with something appealing to the eye. I gotta have something nice to display in my space. So, what guides me?

  1. My Faith. At the end of the day, that’s really all I’ve got. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m no stranger to throwing a temper tantrum with God. We roll like that, but He’s been so faithful to me. Some folks casually say the God has always been by their side, but I can truly say that God has seen me through some things. Many times, I’ve fought Him the entire way, but I’m clear that my faith wins. So before anything else, my faith is at the top of my list of my guiding values.
  2. An Acceptance that I Am Enough. Hands down, believing this has been the greatest struggle of my life. But, with lots of therapy and hard work (and I’m talking real hard work), I am now at a place where I know that who I am is enough! I am lovable and I am just who God wants me to be, flaws and all! Recognizing this truth has been the key to me giving myself permission to explore those things that bring me joy, deciding what’s most important in this moment, letting go of things that have held me back, and being open to making crazy changes in my life!
  3. My Dreams. At 17 years old, I decided I would be a biology major. I liked science, I liked lab experiments, I liked dissecting things, and I thought I wanted to be a doctor. Within a few years, I no longer believed I was smart enough to go to medical school, and had to figure out something else to do. So, public health was it, and public health is good, I can talk about infectious disease epidemiology for days, but that’s not where my heart lies. There’s a side to me that I’ve never honored –  a creative side, an inspirational side, a deeply loving and compassionate side. I’ve always needed to do the “right” thing that aligned with the image I thought I needed to portray for others, but now my 36-year-old self knows that I need to follow my dreams! I deserve to follow my heart and chase my dreams! I may crash and burn, but I also may find great success. And, I think I’d rather live this life knowing that I sought after my dream and gave it a fair try. If I fail…well, at least I gave my dream a chance to live! That’s what matters most, right!

In writing this manifesto, I feel a bit selfish because it really revolves around honoring me, it doesn’t make much mention of family or friends, but that’s what I need in this moment. I’ve spent lots of time doing things that have pleased others…now it’s time for me to follow my heart and LIVE!

Until next time…consider your own guiding values!

Journeying to 101. Global Leadership Summit

Have I ever mentioned just how much I love creating a 101 list! It’s one of the greatest motivators in the world for me. I’ve been working my current list since June 1st and I’ve managed to place a check next to five things so far. Not a bad start in my opinion.

Today, I had the opportunity to attend the Global Leadership Summit. Until a few months ago I’d never heard of this meeting, but I’m so glad I stumbled upon this information. Without a doubt this is the best leadership event I’ve ever attended. At 5:30 pm, I was still wide awake, taking notes, and fully engaged in the final talk of the day! I’m excited about taking things from the training back to my circles in both my professional and personal lives which is far from my norm, but the summit has been just that good! The beauty of this event is that while rooted in Christian values, the speakers are not limited to faith leaders. Yes, there were two pastors that spoke today, but the majority of the speakers were business leaders and everyone focused on leadership lessons, there was nothing “churchy” about the event. I’m definitely looking forward to tomorrow’s sessions.

So, what are my personal action steps from today’s session…there’s so much, but I know I can only do a few things!

  1. I need to determine who I will plant leadership seeds in. People did it for me, now I need to do it for someone else.
  2. I will create a leadership betterment plan that outlines how I will take responsibility for improving my leadership skills over the next year. Everyone wins when I get better!
  3. At the end of each day I will write 3 moments of joy!
  4. I will be more intentional in giving people a chance. Despite how things may seem, I don’t know everyone’s story…I must be mindful of this.
  5. I will stay hopeful and I will be present with those I am trying to lead.
  6. I will choose to be a student, not a critic. I will choose to keep my eyes and mind open. I will choose to replace “How” with “Wow”.

The last goal, replacing “how” with “wow”, is probably the point from the day that resonated the most for me. The lecturer challenged us to “wow” ideas to life rather than “how” them to death. I think this hit me so hard because I see this exact scenario unfold in so many areas of my life all of the time. When presented with a new idea, individuals in my space are quick to respond with questions that ask how we can afford something or how can we find the people to do that or how can find the time to make that work or how do we think this small church can do that. While individuals hearts may be in the right place, I’m so sick of hearing excuses framed as “compassionate questions”. I really just want everyone connected to me to think outside the box and dream bigger!

With that, I’m looking forward to what tomorrow’s sessions will be…

Journeying to 101. Year of Yes!

Happy Sunday!

Since beginning my 101 list, it’s been my intention to post on here at least weekly, but last weekend, I seemed to run out of things to say. I’m not quite sure why, so I simply blamed it on having a writer’s block. But, I’m back this week…

I’m continuing on my journey to 101. I managed to check one big item off of my list last week…more about that later this week after I’m able to edit some of the pics. In the meantime, I’ve finished another book, Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun, and Be You Own Person by Shonda Rhimes. I started this book quite some time ago…it was a Christmas gift from 2015…and decided to make it my vacation read. I think it was a pretty good choice.

In short, the author chronicles a year of her life where she goes from never saying yes to anything to forcing herself to say yes to everything – herself, her children, her family, her health, and her happiness! The author did a great job of pulling me into her story of facing her personal fears, I could relate to the things she was feeling and experiencing with an uncomfortable amount of ease. I highlighted and underlined several things in the book, but two points sunk deep into my soul – “That never would have happened if I hadn’t stopped dreaming of becoming her and gotten busy becoming myself,” and “I’m great at taking care of other people. So why am I so bad at taking care of myself? Why am I so unwilling to show myself the same kindness and consideration, to cut myself the same slack, to give myself the same protection and care that I would give anyone else?”

That never would have happened if I hadn’t stopped dreaming of becoming her and gotten busy becoming myself.

Shonda was referencing her longing to follow in the footsteps of Toni Morrison in this particular section of the book. She wanted to be a Nobel-prize winning author, but she mentions that while she was dreaming, she was also living in her sister’s basement not reaching her potential. Her dream kept her from being who she was created to be. That hit too close to home for me. I want to write a book and I want to move this blog to its own site…I dream of doing these things…I’m talking I look at others and say, “Wow, one day I hope to be like them…I hope to write like them and I hope to have great impact like them.” I say these things in my mind over and over again, but truthfully, God has not created me to be like others, He’s created me to be me and only me. Sometimes I try too hard to make my circle fit into a square, but I’m not a square…I’m a circle! God created me to do my thing and have my impact, but only in a way that I can do it, I’m uniquely me! So instead of dragging my feet and doubting myself, I think it would serve me well to get a little bit busier becoming myself! That’s not to say I’ve not done anything…I’ve been doing some work, but I’ve been moving slow, so maybe it’s time for me to pick up the pace and march a little faster to the beat of my drum!

I’m great at taking care of other people. So why am I so bad at taking care of myself? Why am I so unwilling to show myself the same kindness and consideration, to cut myself the same slack, to give myself the same protection and care that I would give anyone else?

Now this is the big one for me…if one could earn a PhD in everything that statement says, I’d have it! For more years than I’d like to admit, I have struggled greatly with showing love, care, and compassion to myself…I am hard on me! But this book challenged me to say yes to loving me…ALL of me – my curves and edges, my greatest hopes and my biggest fears, my beautiful smile and my kinky, maybe curly (and quickly graying) hair, my low tolerance of people at times (the introvert in me) and my love of making others laugh! Loving all of me is hard stuff! My natural tendency is to pick myself apart and declare that I am a broken mess that’s beyond repair! But really I’m not…I was made in God’s image with the kind of love that only He can give, so I’m following Shonda’s lead and deciding to say YES to loving me a bit more, caring for me a bit more, showing compassion and kindness to me a bit more, and giving myself the same protection and care that I would give anyone else. I deserve it!

The journey continues…I’m excited about what is still to come!