I’m not sure what I want to do right now . . . cry, scream, punch the wall, or lay into all of those people who try to make me believe the false narrative that racism isn’t real! During my lunch break today, I decided to ride to the Trader Joe’s just up the street. Before heading in the store, I was sitting in my car reading a text message from an old co-worker. Out of the blue an older white man pulled up next to me and began hollering at me calling me a n$%#@! The rant went on for several moments and I sat there in disbelief and shock. I was frozen and scared. I WAS SCARED! I had no idea what this man was going to do next . . . was he going to get out of his car and approach me . . . was he going to attempt to run into my car . . . was he going to park his car in the distance and follow me? It was a terrifying moment for me, and I didn’t know what to do. So I called my Dad not just because he lived through the civil rights era that seems to be present again, but also because he’s my father and he will always seek to protect me whether he’s in my presence or with me in spirit. My Dad stayed on the phone with me while I walked in the store to pick up the one item I intended to get and as I began my journey back to the office. And then, I was left to sit, think, and process what happened to me when HATE knocked on my door today.
You see, people get upset about the Black Lives Matter campaign, people get upset when men of color take a knee during the playing of the national anthem, people get upset when I call 45 racist and a disgrace to this country, but do these said people really understand what it feels like to be a minority in this country! Do they know what it means to get nervous if stopped by a police officer? Do they know what it feels like to question whether it’s safe to stop in specific areas to grab a bite or use the bathroom when travelling? Do they know what it means to not be given a chance when you’re more than deserving of it? I do! Until you’ve walked a day in my shoes, no white person will ever know how it feels to be Black in America! That statement does not mean I dislike Whites. That’s far from the truth with me, there are many White people in my circle who I call “friend”, but this does not negate the reality I experience as a minority.
I’ve been falsely accused of being disrespectful because I’ve been bold enough to ask tough questions in workplace meetings . . . I’ve been told “well, you don’t seem black, you’re just one of us” . . . I’ve been overlooked for positions that I am more than qualified for . . . I’ve been followed in stores so people could “ensure I was not stealing” . . . I’ve been asked to provide additional identification and proof of insurance for car rentals when others have essentially just been given the keys . . . I’ve had to work so much harder for everything I’ve gotten, and it pisses me off that people still find it acceptable to hate me or mistreat me because of the color of my skin! It irritates the heck out of me that I have high school classmates who wanted to be “down with the brown” 20 years ago, and now hateful words roll off their tongue with ease. If you’ve never been an oppressed person (not a black person, an oppressed person because oppression crosses color lines), you don’t know how it feels!
I’m mad about what happened today! Let’s be real . . . I’m cussing mad! Yet, today’s events remind me that this dark world needs to experience the Light! The Light that causes so-called Christians to come to their senses and recognize that we ought not say people who spew hate from their mouths and show it by their actions align with our Christian values! There’s NO WAY Jesus walked in hate and I’m certain what’s happening in this country right now is not pleasing in His sight! The time has come for us all to begin to call HATE what it is. It’s time for people to stop co-signing on hate . . . if it’s your family member engaging in this nonsense, call them out! If it’s your friends, call them out! If it’s your former classmate, call them out! If it’s your co-worker, call them out! Don’t settle and be a listening ear to this nonsense, take a stand, be the light, and decide to make a difference in this world that’s decided to give hate another chance to live!